Why We Hate Us

I've referenced this book I've been reading lately, Why We Hate Us by Dick Meyer, in recent posts. I'm finally done with the book and wanted to give a full-coverage post on what I got out of it. As someone who often finds fault with American culture and politics, I raved to anyone that would listen about Why We Hate Us.  
Meyer addresses modern American discontent, giving credit for this unhappiness to things like pop culture, 24-hour news media, marketing and advertising, money (of course), and our two-party political system. All of these things, according to Meyer, have led to less genuineness and integrity, more rudeness, moral confusion and loss of identity and tradition, and a whole lot more disconnect and isolation. If you've been reading this blog for awhile, you might guess by now that I ate this book up.

I think most disturbing about modern American culture is our obsession with celebrities. Basketball players no longer merely play basketball for our favorite teams; they now entertain us, sell us shoes, accessories, and food, tell us who to vote for, and act as role models. Fans want to know what they do when they're not playing basketball: if they're married with children or single, where they live and what they do for fun and most especially when they get in trouble. Similarly, movie stars, singers, and politicians all find they spend an equal amount of time in the public eye for their personal lives as they do for their careers. Being famous has become an around- the- clock job.  We want to know how they live and what they do with all that money. We are sad when they disappoint us for being human--for making mistakes that normal humans might make, but not these heroes. We have put them on pedestals. This is where the rise of the reality television show has come from.
Sadly, what we like most about the private details of celebrity lives is these faults. Why we might be disappointed in what we find, we also relish it. We want to see people fall; we want them to make mistakes. In a recent news example, the people behind Invisible Children have been getting a lot of press lately. As soon as that video took off, Invisible Children got a lot of press, good and bad. They had many critics and many followers and everybody talking about their mission. While I personally don't agree with the methods of this movement, it seems clear that Invisible Children acts with no malice; the intentions of the group were good. While I agree that is important to make people aware of other sides to this story, many people ripped them from limb-to-limb.  Suddenly, the people behind the camera were in the public eye all the time. Naturally, as soon as one of the co-creators stumbled, news media was all over it, and haters had it up on their Facebook and Twitter feeds. You see we wanted these people to fall. We wanted to humanize them. We wanted to see them mess up, we wanted to call their bluff ,and so we did. One man's personal mistakes that have nothing to do with his career (and shouldn't) are now flashed all over media for all to see and for others to judge his career and the organization on. We see this happen time and time again with politicians. We no longer trust their politics and governance because we found out something we didn't want to know about their personal life. Again, this information should not affect the way a person does his/her job.

These people we are watching are our fellow humans. We ought to lift them up and we certainly ought to allow them the right to live their own lives unwatched. I have the privilege of getting to go home after i'm done working for the  day and doing whatever it is I want to do. Our celebrities, politicians, thinkers, athletes, and public figures no longer have that option. It's a wonder anyone is brave enough to do these jobs anymore. We wonder where all the people with integrity are; perhaps people with integrity are now too afraid to run for public office. They'd rather protect their families and their dignity. Perhaps the spotlight and fame drives our young celebrities to some of what they get involved in. They act out because we are watching.

Along these lines, why do young (and not young) people look to these famous individuals as role models? What has happened to our real role models--parents, teachers, religious and community leaders? As a nation, we have abandoned our traditions and culture and replaced it with dependence on self to guide self. We believe we each have our own moral compass that guides us: the same rules don't apply to everyone. Our strong, sturdy institutions have been replaced with capricious whims of our ego and id. We are building our identities, values, and "selves" on things that we have created, instead of our family history and tradition. This is why so many people find hobbies, music, style, and interactions with others as outlets for self-expression. We use tattoos to tell people about our spiritual beliefs; we use our individualized political beliefs to distinguish ourselves from our neighbors. This is also why so many people find it ok to be rude to others--they are merely expressing their viewpoints, which you clearly must know in order to understand their unique character. What started in the 60's as a mantra to get people to think for themselves has turned into the marketing and branding of self.

The book provided insight into the shortcomings of modern society--it got to the root of the present issues.  While I have often felt much discontent with American "lifestyle" (Meyer has something to say about "lifestyle" as well!), this book really helped me put my finger on what was causing my anxiety and what I can do to at least make some changes on the smallest level--with myself. For starters, while it won't be easy, I want to start unplugging. Not entirely, news and media are wonderful inventions, we've abused them. I also want to belong to a community and respect the traditions of my family. If individuals can account for their own integrity and values, then the problem will solve itself. As the front cover of the book states, "There's a cure--read Why We Hate Us." 


--Megan